Happy summer, dear readers. I am back after a bit of time away. My attention has been elsewhere by necessity, but I hope to be posting more regularly going forward. I intend to focus on the magic shop this autumn, mid-September through December.
I've started a Substack blog for my plant-based recipes and discussions. Here's a link for those interested. You will love Substack. I've found dozens of excellent writers posting wonderful stuff there. Here's a link to mine:
Enjoy today's post.
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I have layers.
You know, like an ogre.
Since hitting my sixties, it feels as if the layers I have worn over my innermost self, each a distinct part of me, are peeling away.
My newfound way of eating is peeling physical layers of me away. Impurities, toxins, cholesterol, plaque, inflammation, the sugar and fat from my blood and organs. My body is growing lean and strong. My energy is high and steady. I feel I'm growing younger every day.
But it seems that layers are being peeled away from my emotional makeup, as well. That makes sense, since every part of us is connected to every other part. We're an ecosystem. Our bodies maintain a delicate balance, with each and every cell and system dependent upon all the others.
The layers between me and my feelings have thinned or vanished entirely. I feel everything now. I am bubbling over with compassion and empathy for every living being.
My feelings are hurt a little more easily these days and I don't get over it. Ever.
For example, if I tell you something I'm passionate about and you roll your eyes, (literally or figuratively) I will never talk to you about my passions again. I feel my feelings too much now, to risk that eye roll again. And that's freeing.
As a bonus, with this newly heightened ability to feel my feelings acutely and immediately, I've discovered that I no longer have to care so much what those eye-rollers think about me. This is an even more freeing revelation.
Which brings me to the ants
I had ants show up in my kitchen this spring, those little ones that flock to anything sweet. Usually I put out ant poison and the ants carry it home where it is shared and destroys the whole colony. Usually, that ends my ant problem.
This year, when I saw the first ant, I felt compassion. Imagine if that happened to us, I thought. Imagine if, in that white-guy fantasy version of The First Thanksgiving, the Natives had invited us the feast and fed us a slow-acting poison, then told us to take the leftovers home to feed our kith and kin. (I don't know what a kith is, but you get the idea.) After all, those Europeans were as much pests to the natives as ants are to me.
Who gets to decide whose life is of more value?
The ant's life is certainly of more value to the ant.
In my head, I heard the only commandment of my religion:
"Eight words the Wiccan Rede fulfill,
An' it harm none, do what ye will."
Had I, I wondered, always tried my best to harm none? I claimed to follow the Rede, but had I actually been following it?
Certainly I had harmed a lot of ants. So that would be a great big no.
A new approach
I took a different approach. I took a white paper towel and nudged it under every ant I saw, then carried it outside and let it go in the grass. I did this consistently, getting every ant I saw, every time they returned, and within two days, they were gone and they haven't returned.
I hope the little guys found their way back to the colony. I kind of visualize them on an epic Lord of the Rings style adventure. I put them all in the same spot, so at least they have each other. They leave scent trails, so they're sure to reunite.
Worst case scenario, even if they died, I've done less harm than if I'd poisoned the entire colony. I delivered the message. You will not be tolerated here. You will not find food here. My countertops taste like Method Spray. Go away.
Taking "Harm None" to heart
My husband, a very wise, deeply aligned and tuned-in person, doesn't think it's possible for humans to exist on the earth and not do harm. Our very presence is harmful. And over time, he's convinced me that is probably true.
My goal, therefore, is to move gently upon this earth, and to cause the least amount of harm possible.
I've been on a winding path since I decided to follow my heart wherever it might lead. All my decisions have been based on what I felt in my heart, by moving always in the direction that brings the most joy.
I've let myself veer off course a few times, but I've consistently found my way back.
Now, I've arrived where my heart led me, a place where I really look at everything I do with an eye toward mitigating harm: Harm to my own body; harm to other living creatures; harm to my fellow humans; harm to my planet, my only home.
And because the Universe is so wise, when I obeyed my heart in that regard, I stepped straight into the healthiest state of my entire life; a state of true well-being in body, mind, spirit, and conscience.
I no longer kill ants. I've long since stopped swatting flies or spiders or bees. Life is sacred. All life.
But autumn is coming, and with it, mice. Wish me luck.
See you next time.